I feared many things over my LIFETIME. Just thinking about living the rest of that lifetime in the same state is scary. In this time, I was able to overcome some and others; well, lets just say that it is a work in progress. Life could also decide for you that its time to cross a specific path and overcoming fears will be the only way to do it (Been there and done that). But I will be taking you on my road of overcoming something extremely stressful in my life right now.
Yessir, at the moment I am battling my own COLOSSAL fear. Blogging and sharing my thoughts make me hyperventilate and it’s a sweating inducing endeavor. I mean, think about it. Your very thoughts are being consumed and criticized on a daily basis; and a lot of online people are way more vocal on the net than to your own face. They can also be extra mean.
So I hope you take this post to heart, because from what I learned, fear BLOCKS you from being the best that you can be. It can also block you from growth and lessons to be learned. Personally, I love me some lessons, if it came out of a bad situation. You appreciate it a heck of a lot more but, I digress.
Come along with me, as I walk through overcoming fears of the unknown. In my case the big, bad blogging world.
What is fear?
Fear is an emotion where one feels anxiety and uneasiness caused by being afraid of a person, place or thing (you can be afraid of multiple aspects at once). You can be afraid of ANYTHING in life. Fear is an invisible entity that grabs you by the throat and leaves you practically frozen. It can also bring on your flight or fight response. Fear is a very powerful emotion. Out of all the emotions, this is the one that can freeze you in place while other emotions can propel you onward. To me fear is necessary, a way of survival. It can save a life or it can destroy it. But when it impacts your ability to grow, that’s when fear becomes the ENEMY.
Working Though Ones Fear
Before I can move forward on blogging or any type of none traditional fields, I first had to work through my fears as it has been keeping me back for so long. I have always been somewhat reserved and for some reason, really shy. But when will it be enough? Could I continue this way, in fear? Living with only those closes to me can hear me (if they chose to).
The more time I lived in fear, the worst I felt. All the want in the world would not let this fear leave me be and also did not let me GROW as I should be.
The Day It All Changed
Soooo one morning, I decided NO MORE. I fired up my internet search bar and researched “Fear”. I needed a way to OVERCOME it, so that it did not HINDER my future. You future is already in a delicate balance as it is. Give yourself a break, but do not use that break as a way to not achieve your goals of FREEDOM. I do not want to live in a lie created by me. I yearn to live in MY truth.
So I wrote down a couple of steps I thought relevant to me and maybe can be a helpful tool to you too. These helped me to work through my fear, so that instead of living in IT, I lived within my truth instead.
Tips to Work Through Your Fear and START living:
1. Allow yourself to sit and be in the fear for 2-3 minutes at a time. Breathe with it and say, “It’s okay.”, repeat if necessary. The idea behind this is almost the same as self affirmation. This can eventually train your thoughts into believing it is okay, even if and when you move forward.
2. Writing down the things you are grateful for. Anything that can distract your mind from your fear. This can also replace the feeling of fear with the things you are grateful for.
3. Exercising is a great way to work though your fear. It gives you a way to take your mind off of things; while giving an out to the build up of energy your fear creates in you. It is called anxiety.
4. Using humor to deflate your worst fears gives you back a sense of control over your anxiety. Control even, if its an illusion, gives you power.
These 4 tips were important to helping me to jump start my plans, without all the embarrassing reactions. This only works if you put EVERYTHING you have on the table. It can be really easy to get LOST in the planning stages and never progress to the execution stage, which I spoke about in my previous post Beauty In The Raw – Glow Up. I believe it is mostly your flight response taking over; as it did for me whenever I failed to execute a plan of action anyway. Everyone has their own demons, so who’s to say why we give up, right?
Being fearful only helps when we give in. The power it holds in its grasp is only there because it is given freely by us. Therefore, it can ONLY be taken away by the very ones who hand it over.
So, who wants to take back power? Because to be honest, there’s not much we control throughout our lives; why not control WHAT WE CAN.
Taking back OUR POWER
Not to get things twisted, I am still TERRIFIED of failing. At times, I get bombarded with thoughts of how much money and time I have spent going down this road and there it goes, shallow breaths and sweaty palms and pits. I still have to go through my list almost DAILY to settle the breathing problem I have developed since starting my online blogging (You can laugh, it’s OK).
It gets easier, or I refuse to believe it doesn’t. Either way, I am going to go through with this until the very end. And THAT my friends, is how you take back power. That is how you KEEP strong against the forces of fear…
Come on this road with me, its less scary if we traveled in groups.
With Much Love